Blatherings. Aspirations. Gossips.

The Shallow Spot in The Pond

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: June 15, 2011

Oh. That’s you

You know the feeling you get when some girl proclaims her eternal unwavering love for her boyfriend? When she’s barely even broken up with her last one.

The way she talks about trusting him completely, being there for him (in this big, long-winded blog post for the world to see no less) — when she’s done the exact same thing for her LAST boyfriend. And the last. And probably the last dozen ones too. Makes you wonder doesn’t it?

(Does she recycle her words of love i wonder? There can only be so many ways to express ‘heartfelt love and devotion‘. My gawd.)

Oh, did i mention she also wrote about successful relationships? At this point i kinda did a combination of guffawing and snorting. Oh, we all know how many of those you’ve had!

And seriously, it’s really funny how you’re talking about gaining/keeping his trust…when he’s the one who should be thinking about that. For some reason, looking at that lovey dovey (actually pretty ugly) photo of you guys, i kinda think you deserve each other.

…~~Maybe. (Just don’t produce any babies!)~~

And your talks of him being The One and marriage is so…it gets me flabbergasted every time. Every single time. So it’s not just one time. I think you get me.

Protected: Look in the Mirror, and Tell Me You’re Better

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: June 5, 2010

In: Get Over Yourself
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The Best of Friends <3

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: June 2, 2010

In: Awwww. ♥ | Sudden Revelations
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突然觉的自己很幸福~

These 6 days, i have no regrets.
Thank you for remembering, and promising to never forget.

They tell me i’ll have to move on eventually.
That time will wash away all memories and feelings.
Whatever we shared we’ll all forget.
你不懂。
You don’t have friends like mine ♥

Lost.

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: May 9, 2010

In: Dramatized | Reality Ain't That Sweet Now | Uncategorized
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As depression sets in, I can’t seem to fight anymore.
And all i can do, is to stop you from seeing.

After the wave of optimism and elation of those few days, i feel so insignificant.
Missing you, it’s finally caught up.
The full-force of abandonment, how tragic.
I remember what i’d say to others.
But nothing’s ever so easy. I can’t think of any.

And you’ve moved on.
Your perfect life, 没有变过。
What i thought i had for a moment there.
And now it’s all crumbling down.
We all have to move on sooner or later,
But that hour and a half…maybe im not so different after all.

Her & her. What i thought we’d be.
And she’s looking to be having fun.
最后又是谁最幸福呢？

I finally feel the importance of family.

Protected: 也许。

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: May 5, 2010

In: Dramatized | Inconsequential Mumblings | Reality Ain't That Sweet Now | Sudden Revelations
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Posted by: itzmywonderland on: May 4, 2010

words can mar. maybe not intentionally, but it hurts just the same.

I don’t blame you…and how could I? I value your truthful opinions, no matter how they may hurt. I used to think words may never hurt me, and yet here it is. Those closest have the power to make it hurt the worst. “Sorry” has no place here.

不是不可以，只是不想让你失望而已。

I used to be so emotional, digging holes and wallowing in my own misery. But not so long ago you said I’ve changed, a different person now…matured in thinking, do you know how i felt then?

Being optimistic in good times isn’t hard. Nor is helping others when you’re happy and comfortable. It’s when bad times come around, whether you can stand as tall or feel as hopeful as before…that’s what makes a person strong. And i clamp it all down.

I used to think showing your true emotions is what everyone should do.
Letting your emotions hang out, it’s no shame.
Apparently, I’ve learned a lot in these few months.
I’ve prided myself in thinking what i think is right.
Now that i’ve accepted that anything can change, what else is in constant in life?

Protected: It’s gotta be enough.

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: April 26, 2010

In: Awwww. ♥ | Dramatized | Reality Ain't That Sweet Now
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I’ve made the choice.

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: April 26, 2010

Caged, bound and gagged. That’s not who i am anymore.

After several days of grueling debates, changing my mind roughly several dozens times and nothing short of a couple of liters of frustrating tears, im finally making the decision to stick to where i am now. It’s been rough. I’ve been nagging ever since forever that i hate Physics. It’s the one path i’ve never really wanted to go down, i’ve known i might but it never registered in my mind that’s what i’ll be doing and what it actually means.

And i was so ready to take that one big step forward that’ll change my life. For better or for worse, i believe what i thought was “drastic times call for for drastic measures, i’d do anything to achieve what i want.” Because that’s the path im going to have to walk down the rest of my life. It’s not that easy, it’s never gonna be that easy.

But now, i guess i feel much better….more positive in my approach. Because right now, im not the animal being held captive against my will. Im the one who had the choice to bolt but stayed anyways because it was the easy way out. Did i say easy? It was the secure way, the one way that would have my future pretty much planned out.

You can argue that nothing’s changed. But really, it’s a world of difference. Even though im still in the same situation, i’ve gotten my freedom back and it’s the feeling that i made the choice, that makes all the difference. Im going down this path because i chose to.

A renewed sense of purpose is what i feel )

Protected: Get Real.

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: April 23, 2010

In: Get Over Yourself | Reality Ain't That Sweet Now | Sudden Revelations
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Law & Revelation.

Posted by: itzmywonderland on: March 28, 2010

In: Sudden Revelations
3 Comments

今天去听law! 其实不是想像中的那么闷、无奈、痛苦…算是还好吧？！

忘了通知geok一起去! haih~ 那也算了吧，因为其实都没什么期待…把这件事抛到后脑去了，其实可以算是忘了它==”

我被 assign 到 Bilik 1，那个“老师”很好…几有幽默感的！！他的英文虽然很好，但是发音真是烂透了！没听清楚还以为他在说 Iban 话呢==” 国语吧…他的国语超 blur 的…更惨就是我班那时后很多 Malays & Lakia，所以他们都谈的很爽== 我就很惨需要 tumpukan 100% 的集中力！

Okay, this is wearing me out. You have no idea how tiring it is typing in chinese!! Anyways, the above is just crap. lol

(I shall continue in English unless i deem it necessary to explain again in chinese or some other language wtf.)

So the guy was just teaching us the basic rules, ethics of a good driver etc etc. We were discussing about the aggressiveness of road users. Who hasn’t seen aggressiveness on the roads anyways? I mean, i’ve even flipped off a couple of cars (intentionally) and i wasn’t even the driver! (Oops.)

So most of us would think guys would be you know, the main culprits. Since they have bad patience and, umm tempers? lol. Well females are deemed the lesser drivers so i guess we’d be more careful and slow, therefore less prone to violence. But the guy said females are actually more aggressive on the road than guys. Can you believe that?!

He explained it in a way that made me suddenly think of this phrase — “敢爱敢恨”。Like that’s the basic nature of women. That what we say, we mean it fully. Up until now, i haven’t even thought of that applying to women, especially not myself. It’s a fresh way of looking at things and i think it’s quite true. For me anyways.

When i’ve made up my mind, i tend to block out other options.
When im angry, i say irrational things.
But the worst part is i always follow up what i said i’d do
Even after the steam is gone
Right or wrong doesn’t matter anymore.

Another interesting concept, that females live up to 5 years longer than males because we females tend to express our feelings when in contrast, men tend to bottle it all up. (Now, some consider female nagging a main cause of shortened male lifetimes, but that is another matter altogether.) The concept is quite intriguing, compared to the other explanation that female extended lifetimes are due to having to endure birth pains -_-”

oh well. I wish guys can express their feelings openly too. Then it wouldn’t be that hard to figure out what they actually think eh?

是。发疯了。也不知道为什么突然写华语字！！

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